I once asked a particularly thoughtful and successful real estate agent how he gets through the tough times that inevitably befall his business.
He said simply, "I find something to do. I call an old client. I knock on doors. I visit a new neighborhood. I simply do something to keep me busy."
I recalled this conversation this week when I read about the death of Dr. Aaron Beck at age 100. A Freudian-training psychoanalyst, Dr. Beck developed a new therapeutic framework called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.
Rather than dwelling on the stories and memories of a person's past, Beck urged patients to focus their attention on their behavior in the here and now. Action shape thoughts, Beck taught, more than thoughts shape action.
Stay Out of the Kitchen
Let's say we are trying not to overeat. A Freudian analyst might start by exploring why we overeat and the needs it satisfies for us. Beck would start by urging us to limit the quantity of food we keep in the kitchen and the amount of time we spend there
Which approach is more effective?
Of course, it depends on the person and good therapists combine aspects of them both. But Beck shifted attention from the mind to the body, from head to the hands. In so doing, he made therapy accessible to millions of more people.
Why This Matters
Everyone goes through tough times. No matter how dazzling or successful, we experience times of pain and suffering. The Bible captures this truth with a wonderful observation in the Book of Ecclesiastes. "Time and chance," he says, "befall us all." (Ecclesiastes 9:11)
Pain and suffering can paralyze us. Action can help heal us.
Even though he was not overly religious, Beck clearly drew from biblical principles in his work. The Bible is much focused on what we do than what we believe.
For example, the Bible contains no word for "belief." The Hebrew often translated as "faith" or "belief" really means "faithfulness" or "commitment."
In other words, to believe is not simply to subscribe to a set of principles. Rather, it is a commitment and faithfulness to a certain way of life. It finds expression in what we do and not only what we think or believe.
Buy a Ticket
Let's say you want to make Sabbath a part of your life. A good rabbi would not tell you to simply "Well, take time to rest and pray on the Sabbath and you will experience its joy and beauty."
Rather, one would say, "Take five minutes and light candles every Friday night. Or take 10 minutes and read from the Bible every Saturday." Concrete action shapes us more than abstract thoughts.
This is true in other parts of life as well. People often ask me what to say to someone who has lost a loved one. I tell them to show up. Give them a call. Bring over a meal. The concrete action--doing something--matters much more than the words they say.
There is an old joke about a man who asks God every day to let him win the lottery. After many years of this prayer, he finally gets an answer from heaven: “Do me a favor,” says God. “Buy a ticket.”
Sometimes it is that simple: To get from where we are to where we want to be--we just need to buy a ticket and take the first step. Aaron Beck developed a method for bringing this truth into the lives of millions of people, and for that gift, his life will be an eternal blessing.