What is my calling? How do I find it?
People of all ages ask this question. Of course, young people feel it acutely as they grow and begin to work and build a career and a family.
But those who are retired or nearing the end of their career also ask themselves this question. What am I here to do?
Is there really an answer? Is there one thing we are uniquely qualified to do? Absolutely.
But it's not always obvious. And figuring it out takes time. We can find some guidance in this quest in the Bible.
For many of its key figures, purpose did not come easily.
Jacob comes to mind. He begins his life, as most of us do, focused on himself. He manipulates his brother into selling him his birthright. He tricks his father into giving him the blessing of the firstborn son.
When he first encounters God, he even sets conditions with God for following God’s commandments. He relies on cleverness rather than a sense of purpose.
Then he experiences the harshness of life. He is tricked by his father-in-law Laban. He is forced to work for him for 14 years. And he is separated from his family for more than 20 years.
And just as he is about to see them again, he learns his estranged brother Esau is near and wants to meet with him. He fears Esau plans to kill him.
With all of this on his mind, Jacob spends an entire evening wrestling with a mysterious man. As the text puts it, "Jacob was left alone, and a man wrestled with him till daybreak." (Genesis 32:24)
The text does not say who the man is. But I suspect the man is...Jacob himself.
He is struggling with his past, present, and future. Will his life be a constant effort to manipulate and scheme to get what he wants? Or will he follow his birthright and trust in God's guidance?
The wrestling match itself ends in a draw. But the point is Jacob survives. And he has been transformed.
He has a new name, Israel, which means "one who struggles with God." Even his body has changed. He walks with a limp, a physical sign of the change in his soul.
Why these two particular changes? The limp is a sign of a core truth: real struggle always produces wounds.
Those wounds may fade over time, but they leave their mark. After a real struggle, we are not the same person we once were.
His new name symbolizes Jacob/Israel's resilience. He is one who struggles--and grows from it. His purpose is to embody that resilience so that his descendants, the children of Israel, may inherit it.
And we have. Centuries have struggle and persecution have molded a resilient people. Tragedy has consistently been followed by renewal. We pray it continues to be so.
I've struggled with that question: My best crack at an answer is that since the core features of God are love and oneness then I get close to a calling when I choose those character qualities for my life